First Big Snow Comes Early!

Holy Smokes, Moms! I have barely put away my Halloween decor and already the white stuff is covering the ground! As it came down this morning, I found myself scrambling around my yard putting away things that should have been put away weeks ago: My kids's bikes, garden decor, and the like. While not an exuberant amount of snow, it was enough to make a small snow man and have some time to play! It was a crash course in being prepared, that's forsure! lol.. Luckily I wasn't caught off guard. We had our boots and snowpants, and the rest of our gear ready. We can use an extra pair of water proof mittens or two, but all in all we had a great day!
I hope you and your families are enjoying this change. I feel like it's a bit early and am not sure if I am completely ready yet for this whole winter business, especially the holidays. Whew! But ready or not winter and the holiday season are here. We will certainly try to make the best of it!

Happy Snowday!

November Already

Hi, Moms~
Can you believe it's November already?! And not just November, mid November at that! We are already surrounded by holiday commercials and decor and I don't know I am quite ready for this yet! I have seen many posts on Facebook already about putting up holiday decorations and listening to holiday music. I just don't have it in me yet! Usually I am not to slow to get in to the holiday spirit. Normally I am one of those people who are all over the decorating and such well before the turkey lands on the Thanksgiving table. However, this year seems different. I am not entirely certain why. I am not sure if its the warm weather or just everything going on with my kids and family but I am struggling to find that spirit of the season that is starting to stir. I am hoping this doesn't last too long!
There have been a number of struggles as of recent. As I mentioned in my column I had a miscarriage earlier in the fall. It drug on and on and this past weekend was the first weekend since that happened that my body started to do its thing again. I am open to the prospect of having another baby, and we are doing nothing to prevent that, but the thought terrifies me. Another loss? I don't know if I can handle that one! Our current status is not trying but not preventing either. How many of you have been through this? This was the second miscarriage in a row for us and I am terrified of adding to that number. Something I heard recently was something I have heard over and over.. That God doesn' give us more then we can handle. Usually we think of that in terms of giving us bad things. But someone recently posed that to me as it pertains to another child. Is God trying to send me a message? Is he trying to tell me that perhaps I can't handle a third so He isn't going to allow me to have one? How I wish I knew His ways and plans He has for me. The reality is that I don't and so I will try to be patient and forge on.
The other complication in life is with my kids, primarily my son. We are going through the diagnosis process for him. He has been diagnosed with ODD- Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Very, very difficult to deal with. It appears as if he may also have ADHD with Impulsivity. It's been a very trying time. We now have been given an Rx for meds for him. I am very conflicted as to whether or not to medicate him. He is after all, only four and a half. But as it's gotten to be more of a safety issue we are going to do so. Time will tell what the outcome will be.
I hope I can continue to come here more regularly to share these insights. I know I have often lacked in consistency in this area, but with another blog for the paper to keep up, it seems a bit easier these days.
In the mean time,
I hope you all have a fabulous week.
See you here again soon!
Amy

The Mom Chronicles: Finding Your Inner Turkey! Nov. 11, 10

The Mom Chronicles: Finding our Your Inner Turkey


Welcome back, moms! I feel like it has been forever since I've been here! With election season now over, I am back reclaiming my spot in your papers and happy to be doing so.

I am happy to report that I have, even in my absence, been keeping good on my end of the fall shape up challenge. While the weight isn't exactly melting off, to my great frustration, what is happening is I have remained commited to my goal even when there were many days I felt like quitting.I guess you could say, I have had to find my inner turkey and forge on.

As many of you are well aware of, motherhood can get a little, oh-who am I kidding, a lot hectic. My house is no exception. Especially in a house where there is just one parent around most of the time, and it happens to be the same one also trying to go to school and achieve her own goals. There are always things to be done, places to go, appointments for the kids. It often seems like it never ends. Yet oddly as it may seem, this hasn't been the biggest barrier for me in terms of achieving this goal set for myself.

What has and continues to challenge me, not only in this instance but in many walks of life, is my own ability to self sabotage. To quit. To throw in the towel. To not fight for what I want. Now don't get me wrong. If you ask those who know me or are closest to me, this is not how they would define me. They would say I am resiliant. I am dedicated. I dig deep and when things get hard I forge on. But appearing that way and actually feeling and being that way are two very different things.

As it turns out this whole shape up challenge and goal to run the Gobble Gait was something I set my sights on knowing I would be challenged by it, more mentally then physically. I have been a runner in the past, running cross country in college and the like. But many times that feels like it was in a different lifetime. And rather then the successes I had in it, I remember that one big time I failed miserably. I remember the worst race of my life, and hardly a run goes by that I don't return to that day in my head and how it felt.

So why then would I set a goal that involves running again? The truth is my moms, that as moms and as women we are faced with obstacles each day. We are faced over and over with failures and things we wish we had done better. Yet, we don't give up. We are resiliant. We forge on. When confronted with the the same bedtime battle we've had for two weeks, or same argument with our daughter we've had so many times we could predict it word for word, we persist. We don't always know how or why, but we do. Some may say it's because we have to, others may argue it's who we are.

But what happens during those times, as I have been facing, when it does seem easier to give up or give in? When quitting seems more desirable then the blood, sweat and tears of continuing the battle? Then what?

Enter my new inspiration: the turkey. I am, afterall, training for the Gobblegait which just happens to be on Thanksgiving, and so then, it seemed rather fitting to involve this delicious yet ever inspiring bird.

I know little about turkeys other then I've never cooked one myself, but that they taste delicious. And so I did a little research. They are actually rather intelligent when in the wild, and they tend to flock together. They can be territorial and fight for what they want or what is theirs. They are aware of their surroundings and have certain inate characteristics that help protect themselves from preditors.

So what does that have to do with any of us? The thing is, when we think of turkeys this is not how we see them. We see them golden and plump and on our tables. We see them as victims. The fact of the matter is turkeys aren't running around seeing each other getting plucked out to be Thanksgiving feasts and just rolling over giving up accepting that fate. No. Infact they flock together. They do what works. They continue to assert themselves to reign over what is theirs. They continue their rituals, they continue to gobble and call out as if to take a stand and say go away preditors! I may not be the most vicious of animal but I am going to puff out my feathers and raise my head high and make you think I am.

This my moms, is what we, too must do. When faced with challenges we must also ban together, which in many ways, is what this column is all about. When faced with obstacles such as the Gobblegait has been for me, we must act in such a way that doesn't show our fear or doubt in ourselves, but find that inner gobble that is going to call out as a warrior call and announce we are here. It may not always be easy to find that part of ourselves. But rolling over and being defeated is also not an option. If I am going to be served on a platter as someone's Thanksgiving dinner, I am going to make them work awefully hard to get me there.

And so my moms as you embark on whatever challenges you face this week, I urge you to take a moment and find your own inner turkey. Not the golden basted one that is on your table, but the Wild one that runs free. See you next week.

The Mom Chronicles: Halloween Safety

The Mom Chronicles: Here's to a Safe Halloween!


Hi, moms! It's finally here! The spookiest night of the year and it's my goal is to help you prevent anything too scary from befalling your little goblins. As usual, I take my role here as an advocate for you and your kids seriously and that means I did the extra research in safety tips for this years trick or treating season so you don't have to! Perhaps you can use the time you would have spent surfing for these reminders and instead spend it implementing some of them. While not the most entertaining of topics, it's an important one.

So let's start with the basics. As usual, so much of this is common sense. Safety is not meant to be complicated. It's about being aware and alert and prepared and just using your head. Kids can get easily distracted by all the treats and fun so it's your job to stay focused and be sure the night goes on with out any more of a hitch then perhaps running out of candy. If that's the worst thing that happens this Halloween, I think you can consider it a success!

Decorations. I've seen them as simple as a pumpkin on a front step and as elaborate as a giant display with lots of lights and inflatables (one of which can be found on fifth street west, just a couple blocks past the fire department). As with your holiday displays, before putting up decorations check them and their cords for wear and tare. Don't overload electrical outlets, connect more then three strands of lights, or use decor with showing or freying wires. If possible, avoid torches and candles. Consider using those LED or battery operated flickering candles in pumpkins verses real candles that can catch a child's costume on fire. Also, while putting out decorations, be sure to check your yard for trip hazards or other things that could hurt kids walking through your front lawn. Help eliminate tripping hazards.

When it comes to costumes, help your children choose costumes that are fire resistent. Even if they are it is a good time to remind them of the "Stop, Drop and Roll" rule should anything happen. Try to choose costumes lighter in color, and if they aren't consider attaching relfective materials. Choose costumes that are not too long and don't drag on the ground and if your child is wearing a mask, be sure it does not restrict their vision too much. Consider applying make up instead of a mask. If your child is carrying props check to see that they are smooth and flexible that they won't hurt themselves or others. Additionally send flashlights with fresh batteries or glow sticks with your kids to make them more visable. Finally, attach emergency information somewhere on your chid be it under their hat, in their treat bag or inside their costume in the event it becomes necessary.

Before your child goes out the door take time to have a conversation with them. Plan the route you will take ahead of time. Stick to nieghborhoods well lit and familiar. Avoid going to areas that are too much out of the beaten path. Consider dressing up or at least just accompanying your kids. If your kids are at that inbetween stage of not quite old enough to go alone but not quile young enough you need to be at their side, consider following a distance behind either on foot or in the car. Set specific times to return home or check in and remind them not to go in to people's homes or cars. Kids should stay on a front porch that is well lit and visable to others. If your child does not have a cell phone consider sending yours with them. Don't allow your children to go alone, either. A group is better. Send them off with neighbor kids or friends so they are not out alone. Reminders about crossing the road are also important. Have your children avoid crossing in the middle of the street. Instruct them to cross at corners or cross walks where they are more visable to drivers.

One of the biggest temptations for kids is to eat that fabulous Halloween candy before it even hits their treat bag. Candy should be inspected by you before they dig in. To help avoid overindulgence before this occurs, consider cooking a spooky dinner for them ahead of time to fill them up so they aren't so tempted to snack.

Finally, while these will all help ensure a safe trick or treating night, it goes with out saying that our world isn't what it used to be and Halloween isn't perhaps as safe as it once was. It is a holiday full of opportunities for not so good things to happen. While we don't want to shelter our kids from fun things like going trick or treating, we need to be smart about it. Consider bringing your kids to a mall or local stores to trick or treat instead of to peoples homes, or going to a community event or even throwing your own Halloween party. Be aware and help your kids be aware to things that just don't seem right. Don't allow yourself to be caught off guard or make your child an easy target. Halloween after all, is supposed to be fun.

With that, I hope you have a safe and not too spooky night of tricks and treats with your wee ones!

Now, before I go, I must say a full hearted thank you to the generous family that so kindly replaced our stolen pumpkins. It was an awesome surprise to find the new pumpkins on our front steps. You made our Halloween! Thank you!

See you next week!

The Mom Chronicles: Halloween Tricks Start Early (10/12/10)

The Mom Chronicles: Halloween Tricks Start Early




Hi, moms. I come to you this week heeding great warning: Beware of the Pumpkin thieves. Yes, regrettably I must report that they are striking again and striking early. Yes, it seems no pumpkin is safe on the stoops of homes in Hastings. Unless they are tied down or spend the night indoors under the safe roofs of their beloved owners who took such care in picking them to be their beloved Halloween jack-o-lantern, no pumpkin is safe.

Unfortunately my family learned about this scandal first hand this weekend when the great big pumpkins that my dad grew for my kids were taken off of our front steps. I was livid. There were my kids bikes and their wagon out front. It was obvious this is the home of small children. And yet the thieves took it upon themselves to come during the night, choosing to ignore the fact that there would be two very sad children in the morning, and boldly took the pumpkins off of our front steps, when the front porch light was on no less! When my son walked out the front door to leave for preschool in the morning he was devistated. What happened to his pumpkin from grandpa? I was hard pressed to hide my anger.

So enters life lesson number one for my son. At the tender age of four he is already learning how cruel and heartless people can be. I tried to make the situation seem not so horrible and told him maybe it was someone who needed them more then we did or didn't have the money to buy their own, to try to instill compassion instead of anger and resentment. Unfortunately, I don't think my son is feeling real compassionate. Likely, this was not a gesture of someone in need. Likely, it was the gesture of some kids pulling some pranks or a selfish, thoughtless adult, and our perfect Halloween pumpkins probably are spread out somewhere on some pavement, their insides all over, from being smashed or whatever else.

As I have shared this with friends on facebook and other members of the community, it seems this is a frequent occurance here in Hastings. I have heard lots of stories of pumpkin thieves coming during the night, sometimes smashing, sometimes just dashing with them. And while I am sure our community is not alone in this, I am ticked. I like to think of Hastings as a nice place to live and raise a family. A place to be proud of and somewhat removed from the ugly things that happen in bigger cities. Unfortunately it seems we are not all that different after all. We have our drugs (in abundance it seems). We have our school attempted shootings. And now it seems we have our pumpkin thieves.

So my moms, I offer only this advice: protect your beloved pumpkins. Unless you want them to disappear, bring them in at night, or put them somewhere hard for these thieves to get to. Don't assume just because they are on your front steps or next to your home they are safe. Apparently these thieves are bold and willing to take the risk. Don't let your kids fall victom like mine, to the thoughtless, inconsiderate actions of others.

Now, my family has the task of replacing what we lost. They will not be as special, as they were not grown with the love of grandpa for my kids, but we will not let the actions of others ruin our Halloween. We will rise above. We will choose to believe there is greater good out there in the form of people who aren't so mean and inconsiderate. We will get new pumpkins and display them proudly (during the day, that is!)

And on that note, my moms, may your week be filled with more treats then tricks, and here is to hoping that the great pumpkin thieves don't strike in your pumpin patch.

The Mom Chronciles: Fall Shape Up Challenge (10/4/10)

The Mom Chronicles: Fall Shape Up Challenge


If even after reading the title for this column you are still here reading it I applaud you. You've taken your first step. For those who read the title and were scared away at the words shape up and challenge in the same sentence I can only hope that one of you gets to one of them.

The reality is none of us like to admit that there comes a time when our shapes get the best of us. When the scale tips to numbers we'd prefer to be the balance in our bank account and our jeans can't quite be squeezed in to with out feeling like a sardine.

As moms we are notorious for not taking care of ourselves or letting ourselves go. We find time for every one else and their needs, neglecting our own. We don't realize it at first. It starts small. One day we forget to brush our teeth, the next we realize it's been two weeks since we shaved our legs, then we move the sofa to find that gym membership card and realize it's been six months since we last wondered where it was, all while munching on a Big Mac and drinking a Diet Coke as if it cancels things out.

Well, this mom is just like many of you facing these very things. And in fact I probably would have continued on my not so merry way barely noticing that I have let this happen to me, too, if not for some recent calls to reality.

This fall, I find myself at the ripe age of twenty nine forced to finally face some things I have chose to ignore for some time. Don't get me wrong.I've known that I haven't been exactly a picture of perfect health. That I haven't worked out as I should or eaten as well as I could have. And then this past week at the doctor's office I got on the scale. I was horrified with what I saw. "That's a lot of two's!" the nurse said. Thanks a lot, I thought. Ouch. Do I really weigh that much? And then there is my climbing blood pressure that we just can't get a handle on, or the fact I now have developed sleep apnea and have to wear one of those dreaded CPAP machines which makes me feel less then attractive when laying in bed next to my husband. Can you say Darth Vador? And I havene't yet mentioned the size of jeans I recently tried on. This doesn't even include what effect my weight is having on my fertility issues.

So you see my moms, I have a problem. Not only have I let myself go, but I have let myself go in such a way that is effecting my health. There is a reality that obesity comes with consequences. We hate to admit it. We all think it won't be us. But it is so many of us.

So this brings me here. My little come to Jesus moment was followed by some soul searching and I decided if I need to get on the horse and get my butt back in to shape, I don't want to do it alone. And so my moms, I am sorry, but I am challenging you to do the same.

The challenge is a simple one. It is not to loose so many pounds or work out so many days a week. It is to set a fitness goal and work for it. My goal is to finally run the Gobble Gait on Thanksgiving. I would welcome you to make that your goal as well. Not run it, perhaps, but walk it. Just participate in it. That gives us just under two months. By setting a goal, one has to make natural changes in their daily lives to accomodate it. I can't possibly get ready for a race by sitting on my rear end eating fast food. And so I have restarted my gym membership. Just so happened I had some personal training sessions left from the last time I had my membership so I am working with someone else that will help keep me accountable. I am looking for healthy recipes to cook for my family, as I know if I eat better I will feel better. And mostly, I am sharing the venture with all of you, encouraging you to jump on board. What better time but the present? The Gobble Gait marks the official start of the holiday season with Thanksgiving and what a better way to start it then with a fitness routine and healthy eating habits? We all dread those added pounds that seem to pile on during the winter months. Yet each year we succomb to them as if we feel it is our duty, and then make it our resolution to shed the pounds. For many of us it never happens.

This year, let's make the resolution that we won't need to make that resolution. Choose to not put on that winter weight. To be healthier. Are you on board?

I shouldn't forget to mention this won't just benefit you, but your families as well. If you are eating better and being more active you families will, too. Everyone can be included.

I will be blogging about my weekly progress on my Area Voices blog. I encourage you to join me. Share your own experiences and come and be inspired. I hope to see you at the starting line in November.

The Mom Chronicles: A Time to Heal (9/28/10)

The Mom Chronicles: A Time to Heal


Fall is finally officially here and with the change of seasons I am reminded of the verse which talks about there being a time and season for everything. I find this season one in which I hope brings waves of healing through the Peterson household. So far, I think we are off to a good start.

With all that went awry the past couple months it was easy to lose focus on the things most important to us. The things, which make our family what it is. These are the things I seek to get back. Fortunately for me, it happens to be my favorite time of the year so perhaps this healing comes just in time that we can heal together under the radiance of the fall colors and coolness in the air.

The thing is stress can have a horrific effect on families. You take what is already a rediculously high divorce rate and add things like financial stress, sick or disabled children and death or loss of life and you see it sky rocket even higher. You look at kids who can normally be resilliant and you put them through significant life changes and one can see regression in skills or knowledge previously learned, acting out and behavior issues, and a handful of other things as well. Now imagine a child who already has developmental challenges as my son and it's been very hard on him. He isn't able to express himself very well and so we are dealing with some of those things I just mentioned magnified by ten. Indeed the past months have been hard on all of us. Certainly my husband and I's already fragile relationship has been challenged. My son struggles to adapt to some of the new changes in his life, and thus far my daughter seems like the most sane of us all!

This said, I am certain we are not the only family who has gone through so much in such a short period of time. We are not the first and certainly will not be the last. There are many families who go through major losses or periods of change and survive just fine. Unfortunately, there are many who don't. We don't intend on being one of them.

So what are we doing to heal? The biggest thing for us is taking time out of the busy to spend time together. Now this can be a challenge as my husband is only in town a few days a month. But I am taking the kids places they enjoy and when he is around, we are going places as a family. We recently went on a fishing adventure. It was great fun. We caught some enormous fish and were able to find escape in a fall oasis that suited us quite well. I have been baking again, and this continues to thrill not just my family, but others who have recieved some of these baked gifts as well. Baking is something I do a decent job at and enjoy, but I don't do much of it when things are as they've been. These days I am making use of the fabulous apples of the season and making things like apple bars and apple crisp. There is nothing that warms the soul more then a hot pan of apple crisp on a brisk day. Additionally baking is something everyone can help with, so it keeps in theme of togetherness.

Perhaps the greatest healing moment came with the addition of a guinea pig whom we named Pumpkin to our family. We had to give up our dog who was a tremendous out and comfort to myself and my kids, and that has been a very big loss for us. Being able to hold and pet an animal can bring a great sense of calm and comfort and so I felt the need to bring that back to my home, so we got a guinea pig. She is the perfect little kid pet. She has a tremendous disposition and lets me and the kids sit and hold her for hours. She is low maintenance, but fits perfectly in our ranks and we adore her. Who knew such a small thing could bring so much good?

And so our journey to heal continues. We certainly have a way to go, but we are off to a great start. We are setting our eyes on the prospect of adding to our family if that is in the greater plan for us, and work to grieve the child we just lost.

And so in the days and weeks ahead my hope is that my family can continue to find a sense of peace and calm and healing that has illuded us for so long.

In the mean time, I will be posting ideas on my blog under the Area Voices section of the paper's website, on ways to help your family heal in times of change and loss. Please feel free to add anything that has worked for you, that we may help each other in our journeys that lie ahead.

Have a great week!